The effects of lack of sleep.

Can a girl get an subtitle!
Russell Crowe ruins everything.
I don't have time for my job.
I'm going to punch you into the future!

My Dating Life, In A Nutshell

"He's an emotionally retarded arty boy who's in love with another woman. Of course I like him."

~ The Decoy Bride

The Answer

"boys are gay. you are awesome. they don't desrve you. end of story."


Miss Parker

On being Head Wizard

What good is wizardry if you can't teleport?

Scully to Treatqueen

Creeps

If you get a creepy vibe, he is a creep - no second thoughts.

Scully

Emotional Heimlich

Chuck: I can't even hug you? What if you need a hug? A hug can turn your day around.
Ned: I'm not a fan of the hug.
Chuck: Then you haven't been hugged properly. It's like an emotional Heimlich. Someone puts their arms around you and they give you a squeeze and all your fear and anxiety come shooting out of your mouth in a big wet wad and you can breath again.
Ned: That's fine for someone else to do if I'm choking on something other than emotion, but you can't touch me.
Chuck: So a kiss is out of the question?
Ned: I've lost my train of thoughts.

Why didn't he call?

Polical Roommie: What was his excuse this time?

TQ: His mom was on the phone 'til late.

PR: Well, he's never going to have sex with his mom.